|Reading the call|
Thursday, May 23, 2013
After many incidents and bumps in the road my papers were finally turned in! They were turned in the day before we left on vacation to the Dominican Republic and I am extremely grateful because it made that week pass by a lot faster! We got home on a Sunday and it was here by the following Wednesday. I did however wait until the Friday to open it so that people that I wanted there could be there. So here is how that all went down, I got home from work around 5:30 and we ate dinner while we waited for 7:30 to come around. I set up the computer so that my relatives who live far away could watch and set up everything else just trying to get the time to pass quicker. As people arrived they all made 2 guesses on big maps that we had hung, one stateside guess and one foreign guess. So 7:30 came around and we were still waiting for my sister and her husband to get there, they had previous engagements and were just running a little behind. So when they got there we started the live video and an ad came on so I had to sit there and wait for the ad to stop with my call in my hands and the envelope covering the mission call letter. It was the longest 3 minutes of my life I kid you not. Finally the ad stopped playing and I could read my call. As I was reading I was so overcome with the spirit that it was difficult for me to read. As soon as I read the words "you are hereby called to serve as a MISSIONARY for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints", I lost it. I knew then and there that no matter what the rest of the letter said I was doing what I am supposed to be doing and it was all going to be OK. Even if I did get called to Siberia or something like that. As I moved the envelope down to reveal the next line my eyes jumped ahead and saw the word Nicaragua and I thought to myself "that isn't even a word, I must have read that wrong!" Sure enough as I read on I read "Nicaragua Managua North" I had never heard of Managua and I didn't even know how to pronounce it, but it didn't matter. People always say that they KNOW that where they are called really is where they are meant to go but I never believed it until I read those three little words. At that point I couldn't even tell you where it was on the map but I knew without a doubt that that mission is for me.
So some of you may know the story of why I decided to serve a mission but for those of you who don't know I am going to tell you! As you know the age for mission service has been changed and girls can now serve starting at 19. This is a huge change and it has caused a huge surge of girls my age to leave. When the announcement came out I was dating someone and I brushed it off because I didn't ever think that a mission was for me, but it kept nagging at me and it was constantly on my mind. I started praying for direction because my head kept telling me the opposite of what my heart was telling me, but I knew that the Lord would answer my prayer and I needed to be OK with whatever he had to tell me. So as I was driving to work one day the song "Come Thou Fount" came on. As a listened to the words of that song the line "Prone to wander Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love" stuck with me. I could not get that phrase out of my head and it was frustrating because I couldn't figure out what it was supposed to mean. I thought about it for the rest of the week. The following Sunday I was visiting my home ward and they were doing a special musical sacrament meeting where the speaker would talk about their favorite Hymn and then we would sing it. Music has always had such a powerful effect on me and I strongly believe that it is one of the strongest connections between me and my Father in Heaven. So as I was sitting in that chapel listening to the songs we were singing, it hit me. I hadn't been focusing on the whole phrase from "Come Thou Fount" I had gotten stuck on a little part of it. The remainder of the phrase fled through my mind, "Here's my heart, Lord, take and seal it, seal it for Thy courts above." and at that moment I knew what I needed to do. I knew that my heart needed to be in it. I knew that I needed to stop focusing on the little parts and start looking at the whole picture. I was holding myself back by not seeing the whole plan. Yes my life would change drastically, yes I would have to sacrifice a lot, but I knew the blessings would outweigh any of the sacrifices I would have to make. I know that a year and a half is nothing compared to what He did for me. I know it isn't going to be easy, in fact it is going to be really hard, but I also have a sure knowledge that He would not ask me to do anything that I couldn't do. I am ready to take on this task! :)